Digging out

There are two universal laws when dealing with vacations or time off.

One – the amount of work left to do will inversely increase to the time left as you approach your vacation.

Two – the amount of work waiting for you will exponentially increase the longer you are gone on vacation.

I was gone for two weeks. And many of the intrinisic rules I had started to build in my position were broken the very first day I was gone. Sometimes it feels like a secret plot. So here I am, shovel in hand, coffee in the other, trying my hardest to dig out. The piles are huge, mountains almost, and it seems a small tribe of wild gnomes have moved in. Sharp little teeth and wicked temperments. Much like the tribes in the Heart of Darkness, they shoot arrows from the cover of darkness and I have to just make do with a shovel and lot of screaming.

I am Gulliver in Lilliputia.
And the saddest part? The piles are growing. I am a Prince of Choas at this point. Just trying to keep it together until my teeth get yanked on Friday.

This week is awesome! Awesome like Pee Wee Herman at your Birthday Party. And he’s drunk.

…And naked.