Ahhh Interviews

Interviewing people is one of the most uncomfortable social interactions that I can think of, short of a funeral or a bad date. (I guess interviews and bad dates are the exact same thing, actually. “First dates are interviews, Gwen.” – Van Wilder)

The interviewee is nervous and constantly double guessing answers and the questions asked, whilst the interviewer is unsure of the right questions to ask while measuring the stress response of the interviewee. Makes for an unusual interaction of flight versus fight nervous responses on both sides.

The interviewee wants an opportunity to prove themselves and validate their existence to a fellow human being. The interviewer is wondering what is for lunch while counting the number of blinks the interviewee is making during their responses to the questions. And I had to pee. Can’t forget that.

I thought I was going to explode. Note to self: Do not drink coffee before an interview.

I pity HR people. You either really have to enjoy it or be just a little stupid.

Like crazy stupid to force yourself to run through the same paces every single time a job is posted or you have to interview someone. I bet that behind Guidance Counselors, HR folks have the highest rate of blowing their noggins off. With a nailgun. Three times. Because the first and second time they biffed it.

That is dedication.

Me? I am just not cut out for that rot. Hiring and Firing is just not my thing. Too exhausting.

And I generally have to pee.

Damn you coffee, damn you and your deliciousness!