9 out of 10 monkeys believe they are not behind glass

I know the reality is that what I deal with on a daily basis is probably not at all that much different than what most working people deal with. But its new to me, and I have to deal. I also understand complexity and bureaucracy are the inevitable outcomes of any human system greater than 1+N^N, but the shit I am seeing is completely violating my sensibilities… like being in a deep dark prison cell on a cold, dank, rat-infested island and your only company is a huge overly-muscled convict eying you like a sailor would assess a twenty dollar Malaysian hooker.

Background: The comparative scale between the environment in South Texas and my own environment really is not all that different. But to them, it is the difference between a mom/pop shop and Microsoft. Really they are double our size. But if you double 2, its only 4. And that is the scale we are talking about on an enterprise level. 800 vs 1800… and a budget difference that is higher by an order of magnitude.

And all this is on the subtext that this company is trying to tie itself together still after a buyout that happened six years ago. That is like saying that a cadaver is trying to heal from the fatal head wound it suffered. Six years! And what to show for it?

A bunch of bickering whining babies. And I am one of them. But at least I REALIZE IT.

I am so sick of the condescension, the assumptions, and the “we have the better way” mind set. It is inane. They are so wrapped up in their own paperwork, they can’t imagine that there may be a better way. I am not saying I have that way or that my way is it, but at least I am capable of doing a ten man job out of the parent company all by myself. That tells me something is wrong. Very very very wrong.

When did “getting the job done” change from actually doing something to just filing out static paperwork and having meetings about it?

The response I get is that this “This form is built on the industry standard, best-practice ITIL framework.” Bullshit. What it does is make it sound like your 1,800 users are 50,000+ users and you are woefully ineffective and inefficient. If the change control process hinders the execution of work at this scale, then it is inherently broken.

Period. Especially when we are doing the same thing, better, at 1/10th the cost. Boo-yah.

And, by the way, if you think that your environment documentation should live in word documents and excel spreadsheets, then you are still in the 1990s. Welcome to this thing called the INTERNET.

(It is full of rainbows.)